Third Party Perspective

Did you ever get so wrapped up in thinking you were right about a situation, about maybe things you're doing in your life, but then someone else points out to you that maybe you've got it all wrong. Well, let's talk about it this time. On Wife's Thoughts, it's time for a virtual campfire sit down with Terry Weiss. Will come to Weiss's thoughts. Well, Hello there, everyone, welcome to another virtual campfire sit down I lovingly call Wife's Thoughts. I am so glad that you're here today. You decided to spend some of your valuable time with me. We truly, truly, truly, truly appreciate your listenership, and we hope, we hope all is going well with you and yours today. Now, if you want to reach out to me, you can do it on Twitter at Terry Weiss, wic at Terry Weiss on Twitter, or for those of you that prefer to call it X, I'm there Facebook. Just look for Facebook Weis's Thoughts on Facebook. Got a YouTube channel, a couple of them, actually, Weis's Thoughts on YouTube or Terry Weiss on YouTube either, or you can search for and you'll find my channels on YouTube as well. And indeed. And now the other usual places where you can find people that are on social media. Okay, great, Now the other thing I wanted to touch on today as we talk about and get into the program. Like we talked about in the teaser, we're going to talk today about something called third party perspective. Okay, let me just grab a sip of coffee here, m M. Just a little coffee, little energy to get us going. And been of caramel machiato in there. I love Carmel macchiato. Have you tried it? This isn't a commercial of caramel machiato. I am not endorsed by Carmel macchiato or anything. No, but it's good stuff. That's really good stuff. Anyway, I know, back on point, Back on point, Terry, get back on point shell you, sir, have you ever been so determined? Let's say in let's say you had a conversation with someone and you were talking about, I don't know, a topic and something you were very passionate about, and you had your points lined up, You had your point of view based on the information you had. You thought you had all your ducks in a row, as it were. You thought you hey, I've got this, I've got all my ducks in a row. I know that this is actually how it is. Let's see, Dare I say political, it's a political thing, and you say, no, this is how it is. This is what's happening to this group of people, this is how the legislature here in the United States is handling it or not handling it. And you know, this is what should be done, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And you're you're just like, that's it, that's that's how I feel. Then then someone comes along with a different point of view, okay, and says, well, what about this and what about that, and what about this situation that happened in regards to what you're talking about. Now, do you do what a lot of people in the United States especially do nowadays, and say, no, No, that doesn't matter, that doesn't matter, that's got nothing to do with anything. And you're wrong, you're full of baloney. You know, you're you're you're you're living in a bubble. You know, you're out of your mind, okay, or do you take that information in and do you say, hmm, okay, you know what you might be right about that, and then another person comes along that maybe is overhearing your conversation with your individual and says, you know, I've been listening to you too, go back and forth on this topic. However, here's this set of information and facts and what have you? Now? What? Now? What? That's what's called third party perspective. Third party perspective is when an entity or an individual who is outside your sphere of influence gives you their observations and they're not invested or vested in an outcome. That's third party perspective. At least that's my definition of it. Okay, that's my definition. So that's that's what we're talking talking about today on Whiye's thoughts is third party perspective and how it can definitely be beneficial to you. I have I found it to be very beneficial to me at various times throughout my life when I thought, hey, I know what's going on, man, I got to handle on this. I know everything there is to know about this, or in my in my arrogance thought I knew everything I knew about a certain situation. And you know what, I found many many, many times I didn't. It was my own arrogance a lot of us, a lot of us today do not want to even entertain, entertain the possibility of using that resource of third party perspective to help us in decision making, help us in analyzing information, help us in our our intellectual pursuits, or help us in, like I said, decision making with regards to life choices, or should I continue on this path, or should I deviate? Or should I stop this altogether? And I think a third party perspective can be very very very very benefit beneficial tool to use a little more coffee there. Now that being said, that being said, we have to first of all, take a step back, and one of the first things if we're going to utilize third party perspective is decide or evaluate, I guess would be a better word. Where is that third party perspective coming from? In other words, is it someone who they may have a vested interest in the outcome? Okay? In other words, let me give you an example by what by what I mean by that, you're thinking about buying an automobile. You're looking at an suv. Your family says, yeah, get an suv, your friends, yeah, get an a suv. Everybody's driving an suv and you're like, oh, maybe I should get an suv. Okay, And you're like, yeah, you should. Guess you should get an suv. Now here's the thing that third party perspective could come in and say, you don't want an suv. You want to get a motorcycle. And the reason you want to get a motorcycle is because it's way better on gas. There's only you. You generally don't put things in the vehicle, go grocery shopping with it. You're just you know, running from here to about fifteen miles away. You live in a climate where, let's face it, an suv is something you might not have a use for in this climate you live in. Let's say you don't live in a climate that has snow, torrential rains. What have you now that third party perspective coming in saying you really should just get a motorcycle instead of an suv. But when you step back and look at the source that's saying yeah, you should get a motorcycle instead of an suv, the person you're talking to is a motorcycle dealer or works at a motorcycle dealership. So now, okay, third party perspective may may be well intentioned. However, however, they work at a motorcycle dealership or own one, so they have a vested interest in the outcome of you making that decision. Are you with me so far? Are you? I hope so. So that's one way where you know, third party perspective might not be the best advice to take or give it do consideration. Now, let's give you a different example. You're having a disagreement with a family member. Let's say there was a party, a backhanded comment was made by a member of the family that was in attendance at the party about you, and it made you angry. Now you go around, you're talking to other family members, Well, yeah, they shouldn't have said that that. They shouldn't have said that. Oh, they had no right to say that about you. So you're getting validation from people in your family, most of them. Oh yeah, that's right, that's right. They shouldn't have said that. They're wrong. Oh i'd be angry too, Oh my god, I'd be furious. I'd be furious if they said that about me. Oh, you're right, I would call them up, give them a piece of my mind, et cetera. And they're going on and on and on and on and on about this. But then you run into someone. Let's say you have lunch with a friend, and this is let me set the table on this. You go to lunch with a friend who's been a long time friend of yours, and you can feel they're a confidant. You can tell them things, and so you decide to share the party and the backhanded comment that was made about you is that you took as an insult, okay, and you decided to share this with them and what they had said. Now, the friend of yours who doesn't know your family, well, let's say they don't know your family, well, they've never really met them. They're outside that sphere, doesn't know the family member that said the comment to you, et cetera. So your friend, your longtime friend, listens to you regale the tale and tell thangs, et cetera, and they pause for a moment and they say, well, you know, they may have said that because of this. They may have said that because I've noticed that when you do this, this, and this, it may sound to people like you're putting them down or not respecting their opinion. So maybe that's why your family members said this about you. Now, your friend being outside your sphere circle of influence and not knowing everyone in your family, and the family member that said the alleged backhand and comment about you in regards to this situation says says that and brings that information to your forefront. Now, in this instance of third party perspective, your friend doesn't know anyone, doesn't know the member of the family that said it, doesn't really associate with your family, just associates with you, okay, And then there's no agenda. Okay, they have nothing to gain by telling you this. By offering their take on the issue, They're giving you third party perspective from a pretty much like a neutral point of view. So you take that and you're like, hmm, okay, that I would say would weigh heavier and have more credibility in that case. Definitely more credibility absolutely than someone in your sphere of influence or that knows both parties involved. Is see where I'm getting with this. I think a lot of times many of us, and I'm lumping myself in when I say many of us, I'm including all of us, even yours, truly needs third party perspective in our lives to ground us to bring us to reality, to help maybe cut us, you know, knock us down a few pegs, Okay, to coin of a better phrase, to knock us down a few pegs, to you know, to do that. And that's why a lot of people who seek mental help counseling, these are people offering third party perspective. That's why mental health counseling saying, a therapist, a psychologist, a psychiatrist, what have you can be great and should not ever be stigmatized or frowned upon, especially especially in this day and age, my friends, especially now, with all the things going on in the world, all the stressors, all the you know, where we always got to be doing something or we're you know, the attitude of society, especially in the US, is you've always got to be doing something, or you're worthless and why are you even here? So I guess the gist of the program today, the gist of this episode of Wife's Thoughts is that many of us should seek not validation, but many of us, I think, should give strong consideration to seeking out independent, independent, third party perspective when we're when we're maybe struggling with something or have a strong conviction that maybe that you know we need addressed. So don't be afraid to get third party perspective. Don't be afraid to seek that. Whether it's for mental health reasons, whether it's to resolve a conflict, whether it's to make a major life decision in your life, don't be afraid to reach out and get that third party perspective because at the end of the day, it could be one of the best decisions you can make to move your life ahead. To move your life forward. Okay, that's all I got for you this time on Whye's thoughts. Remember, my friends, be good to yourself, be good to others. And remember, if you want to see a change in the world, remember it all starts with the person looking back at you in the mirror every morning. It starts with you until next time. Take care and God bless